America's Body
by thatchick21
Summary: Ever wonder where different monuments are located on America's human body? Read this for the answers!
1. Old Faithful

_Author's Note: Please, please review!_

One day Japan was visiting America and they decided to go to Yellowstone National Park….

"Hey! Japan~! You gotta see this!" America exclaims, pointing excitedly at a geyser. "What is it?" a very confused Japan asks. He had spotted a strange thing on America's neck: a pimple. This was unusual, especially because America usually has an impeccable complexion. "What? You have never heard of Old Faithful?" America asked completely dumbfounded that his usually knowledgeable friend hadn't heard of something so awesome. Japan cleared up America's confusion, "I'm not talking about that. You have a pimple on your neck."

"How big is it?" America asks, blushing. 'Oh shit! I bet he's talking about Old Faithful!' Japan musters up his courage to ask what he considers a very embarrassing question. The pimple was very tempting to pop, especially since Germany's OCD seemed to have rubbed off on him a bit. "Can I pop it? I-I mean…" The Japanese man stutters. He settles on just going ahead and popping it. "Nooo!" America dramatically yells as Old Faithful explodes. People immediately start taking pictures of the geyser. Japan, now both embarrassed and amused, asks, "America… where is Old Faithful on your body?"

"…You just popped it…" America says, looking away and blushing.


	2. St Louis Arch

Author's note: Sorry if there are some problems with my history but it was a little bit rushed. Review!

America had been waiting for his chance to show up England for years and today he would finally get his chance. His Halloween outfit would show off his old addition perfectly. He looked at his cowboy outfit one more time before rushing over to Spain's house (it was his turn to have his house crashed by a bunch of drunk countries). America walked in without knocking since he got there at least an hour or two late.

"America!", was heard though out the house when he walked in. He smiled when he heard the sudden gasps as person after person noticed his 'new' jewelry. He knew he'd finally get his revenge for when England had gotten the eyebrow piercing back in 2006 and showed it to everyone. Sure the London Eye was cool but he had something way better. It had taken America a few years to get up the courage to put back in an old piercing.

The St. Louis Arch had been completed in 1965. In the 60's the rest of the world wasn't into having random parts of your body stabbed through with metal. Now everyone could see his awesome naval piercing he hadn't every shown anyone before.

"When did you get that done?" a little to interested France asked. America was about to answer when he saw the blonde with bushy eyebrows he'd been looking for, "Hey Iggy! Your London Eye ain't so cool now is it! The Arch is way cooler!"

England after looking angry for a second shot back, "True it would have been if I hadn't had Stonehenge for years!" The little British man lifted his shirt to show a belly button piercing with a circle tattoo around his naval. Smirking the English man then said, "I believe in your country the right phasing here would be…." He was cut off by an angry American pulling down his pants.

"Haha beat that! See yah!" the American laughed running away. Everyone after getting over the shock of the argument then started laughing as England pulled up his pants and ran after the American cursing the whole time.


	3. Florida

A/N: Thanks sooo much everyone that reviewed and added it their favorites list! You guys helped soooo much in moving things along :D! If you have any certain parts you want done just tell me via review and I'll try my very hardest to get it done! Thanks again!

"When did _that_ happen?" France and England aka my 'parents' asked. Canada at least had politely looked away. "Well…" I started remembering the events that took place a few months ago.

_~Flashback~_

"Fine, if you give me five million and call off your freaking crazy boss!" Spain cried as my boss hit him again. Honestly I'm a little surprised Spain held that long. "Okay deal I'll give you five million," I hand him the money and turn to walk away. "America please Alfred call him…. Ouch!" Spain got hit again. "Jackson stop hitting him. There now admit I'm your hero!" I call back towards them. "Fine you're my freaking hero! Here's the deed to Florida… and must I say you'll or, I mean, the ladies will defiantly enjoy that," Spain winked then vanished into a tomato tree or wait an apple tree. Right, tomatoes grow on plants…. Anyway it took about a day for me to realize what he meant.

_~End Flashback~_

"So gaining Florida made your ummm yea bigger?" Canada asked blushing. "Yes it did," I say buckling my belt, "By the way why did you pull down my pants when I walked in Francis?" England also looks interested. "Well Spain gave me a little tip…" France winked and disappeared in a sudden downpour of rose petals. "Who does everyone but me learn to do that?" I shout. "America, I can't either," Canada says in his quiet voice. "It's a skill only us who lived though the dark ages know.." England says as a disembodied voice.

A/N: I don't really like this one but it was the only way I could think of that would make this not rated M.


	4. Swamps

_A/N: This isn't a specific landmark but its still part of America's body. And consider this disclaimed. Please Review!_

America has a secret. A very embarrassing secret. One that Poland and Lithuania saw at the nail salon. Yes, you read right. A nail salon. America goes to a nail salon. And that isn't even the embarrassing part. The embarrassing part is the reason behind it. This is that story.

Poland was surprised to see America at the salon he normally goes to. "Omg, America? You, like, totes get your nails done here, too!" The preppy blonde exclaimed. Lithuania then noticed the American's nails. "Wow, I would never have thought green would be your color choice," he commented. "Please, don't tell anyone about this!" America begged the Lithuanian. "N-no worries! Honest! I won't tell anyone. You're my friend after all," they weren't exactly friends but close acquaintances. "Hehehe.. This is, like, totes going on my Twitter page." Poland said, oblivious to the two friends' conversation. "P-Poland! That isn't nice!" Lithuania said, trying to wrestle his lover's phone away. Needless to say, he was met with resistance, "Liet! This is, like, the scoop of the century! I want to be the one to report it!"

"I don't want anyone to report it!" America exclaimed, as, ironically, the song "Paparazzi" by Lady Gaga started to play. "Too bad. Already posted." Poland said triumphantly.

~The next day at the World Conference~

"Sooo… America, how was your beauty day?" Prussia asked with a smirk on his face. "I heard they were green, but these aren't…" France said, inspecting America's nails. "Yeah, yeah, yeah. Give it a rest, will ya? I can't help it! Ever since I got all that marshland and those swamps down in the southern states, my nails have been green. I get them done every week to make them look normal again…" said America, pouting. "Prove it," challenged Prussia. "I have some, like, nail polish remover!" Poland volunteered cheerfully. "This is all your fault," America said, glaring darkly at the girly blonde. "Whatevs," Poland said, putting some of the nail polish remover on a cotton ball. "NOO!" America says as Spain and Prussia hold him down and France randomly gropes him. "Iggy! Help me!" the America yelled. "I am sorry, but I am rather interested to see if it's true," Said the Englishman coolly. "Sorry I'm late! I got caught in traffic and- What are you doing to my brother?" Canada said after bursting through the door. "Mattie!" Prussia exclaimed, running to his boyfriend's side. "Who?" asked everyone but Prussia, America, and France. "I'm Canada…" he said needlessly since everyone had stopped paying attention. "There! All done!" Poland said. "Told you so!" America exclaimed as soon as he was free. He then ran and hid behind England for the rest of the meeting.


	5. Arkansas

A/N: Thanks for all the favs and what not! This was an idea from a reviewer. That person is totally awesome because an update would have been much slower if I hadn't loved this idea a million! Reasons like this is why you must review! So do it! (btw Hetalia is not mine….)

"Dude I think you need to go tanning," Prussia says after a meeting one day. "Why? My skin is sun kissed to perfection!" America says before he sneezes. Pulling a tissue at of mid air England hands it to America, "Are you okay?" England could always get so motherly at times, "I- achoo- fine Iggy!" England looked unpleased and without a bit of the (always) stubborn America's consent got Germany, Russia and China to drag the sick nation to his room. England followed close behind.

"Your nose is white," a certain Russian stated in a blunt manner. America looked at him in disbelief, "No it's not." England grabbed a hand mirror and showed him that in fact his nose was white. It wasn't like Prussia's skin white but compared to the rest of America it looked like a piece of computer paper. America grabbed his Ipod out and looked up Arkansas weather. His nose was having really bad ice storms. This explained the sneezing and the nose discoloring. This reminded him to once again be happy most of the cold places went unseen to the rest of the world. Usually they didn't get this white though so America reminded himself to go make sure everyone was alright in Arkansas when he got home.

He looked around the room and realized that it was probably going to be after the nose discoloration was gone. He slyly texted Japan to bring him some spray on tan. England had gone to fetch him some of China's chicken noodle soup. He was saved by Japan who had come immediately. Spraying his nose and rubbing it in Arkansas looked normal again in no time. Japan had to hide in the closet as England came with some soup. "Oh, are you feeling better pumpkin?" England said in a motherly voice. America realized he didn't want to go home quite yet, "A little bit, but I think your right about the getting some rest thing."

England stayed with him until his sneezing had stopped reminding America of when he was little. When he fell asleep it was to England telling him stories about pirates and women.


	6. New Jersey

A/N: Another request! See how much faster updates are! Okay so this one was a little harder to write because I knew nothing about New Jersey and didn't want to make it about Jersey Shore because I can't stand that show. So here's my best effort! Please Review and make requests!

America sighed, he loved being in his ear. Many people only knew about it because of some show on MTV. Most people didn't know that it was were the first organized game of baseball, his favorite pastime was played. He remembered the game well. The Knickerbockers had lost to the New York Base Ball Club. It hadn't even been close.

~Flashback~

Down in the last inning, "Here there's no way for them to win!" England handed over $100 he had bet on the Knickerbockers. "Yess!" America shouted as the New York Base Ball Club scored one last point making them win with 23 points. England mumbled something about this game being a knockoff of his people's game. America paid no attention as he jumped around happy as can be.

~Flashback End~

Sure with all of the lighthouses his east ear had way to many piercing in it but that was no matter. He loved going to New Jersey for every baseball game that was played in its original state. The hotdog stands to the fields themselves just had a sense of homecoming and zest to them you can't get anywhere else. "Damn you! Why do you always win?" Canada sighed handing over a wad of money. "Because I'm a hero and they always win!" America shouted at him taking all the money being thrust at him from various nations. He dodged France's grope running into Russia, "Hello little buddy, half of that is mine, da?" America gave the Russian half without argument. After all the bastard had been the only one smart enough not to bet against him. America still walked away with $800 which wasn't bad for a baseball game. Still he really couldn't wait for soccer season, the other nations were much more into betting big bucks on that!


	7. Redwood National Park

A/N: This would have been faster but the last three days everything that could go wrong did. This was another request! So review! Thanks!

"I dare you to shave your whole body!" Cuba yelled. The nations were playing truth-or-dare at yet another of America's infamous parties. "Noo!" a certain bespectacled blonde yelled out. The Cuban smirked, "Your only rule is no 'chickening out' is it not? Are you going to be a liar and go against your own rules?" America was in quite the predicament. On one hand if he didn't shave he'd be a liar, and heroes can't be liars. On the other if he did shave the whole Redwood National Park would be gone. His people would surely notice and it'd kill a bunch of little creatures. Just an arm or leg wouldn't be bad but his whole body! "Look dude, I can't do that.." America was cut off. "America is a liar, America is a liar…" Cuba chanted. America was about to snap and hit him when a fist came out of nowhere and connected with Cuba's head. "Just shut up already, eh?" a quiet voice said. Cuba looked so shocked that all the nations burst into laughter. America let out a relieved sigh and asked, "So spin the bottle or 7 minutes in heaven next?" Later he would thank his brother for saving his ass… again.


	8. Death Valley

A/N: Just so you guys know I feel super horrible about not updating when I had this written out for awhile now! So please review and give me requests so I can make it up by writing a lot at once!

Canada sat in his room going about his business of keeping his skin healthy and soft when a young America walked in. "Eww why are you using lotion?" the teen looking boy cried out. "Well, with the harsh conditions of the cold my skin gets….." America had walked out losing interest seeing that Canada wasn't embarrassed.

~~ Years later~~

America sat in his room trying to quickly do his business of keeping his skin healthy and soft when a certain nation walked in. "Hahahahaha, I remember when you caught me…" Canada laughed rolling around on the floor. "Shut up! Close the door!" America cried. He didn't want Poland or England walking by. It was to late, "Why are you using lotion, da?" a certain very scary man had walked in. "Close the door and I'll tell you alright!" America was freaking out majorly. "Ok kolkolkolkol," Russia complied shutting the door softly, "Now why do you lotion?"

America sighed but answered, "When I expanded to the California I got this place now called Death Valley. Its pretty much a barren desert and it makes my skin flaky and ashy!" Canada laughed, "Both me and Russia must lotion our skin do to the harsh cold!" Russia then added in, "But the lotion your using, buddy, will do nothing for moisture. Try this," he handed a bottle that came out of nowhere.

So the three countries sat around America's room debating on which lotions where best. Unfortunately good things never last because the door had unlocked to an albino and a Frenchman who seeing what the three nations were doing immediately put there findings (with pictures) on a socially networking site. Needless to say the Prussia and France then got beat up by hockey stick and faucet pipe. America managed to get quite a few good pictures which he then posted. When they finally made it to the meeting, no one said a word about the event and for a certain five nations they found it to be better that way.


	9. Disney

A/N: Please Review and Request! And just letting you know this isn't historically correct but it was the only idea I had.. so enjoy! If it sucks let me know by reviewing!

America was laying in bed, "Why does the happiest place on earth have to hurt so bad!" England watched him, "Would you like a soda?" America rubbed his chest and in an adorable voice of a child responded, "A c-coke would be nice and maybe a-a hamburger?" England hated going to McDonalds but still he said okay. Poor America was suffering because his people had an obsession with Harry Potter.

~Downstairs~

France was sitting in the kitchen drinking some tea. When he saw England he asked, "What's wrong with Alfred?" England didn't really want to tell him but he didn't exactly think he'd be able to get rid of the frog if he didn't. "His people decided to add on to Disney World by adding in a Harry Potter themed part of the park. Both Disneyland and Disney World happen to fall on a sensitive area of his body."

France looked down with questioning eyes saying, "Ouch I bet that must hurt him…" he then mumbled something about making it 'feel better'. England gasped, "Not _there_, its his nipples you pervert!" France laughed and said slyly "Oh I can make those feel good to…" He winked. England was about to hit the blonde when he disappeared, "Why must he always do that?"

England decided to just go get America his hamburger and soda pretending it never happened. But when he got back to America's house, he heard some noises that made him decide he'd leave it outside the door instead. England wasn't happy that the frog was in bed with America but at least now he knew that if he went home he'd finally get peace and quiet. Which would have been fine if his half-brothers car hadn't been parked outside his house.


	10. Gulf Coast

A/N: Please review and request! Umm.. I don't really like this one but enjoy.

~April 20, 2010~~

America was about to pass out when he began to cough. He kept coughing and coughing. Germany was about to ask him to leave the meeting when America spit up a bunch of black stuff. "Eww," N. Italy and Poland cried out. England and Canada ran to his side. Everyone had worried looks. America stopped coughing, "Napkin please?" Someone handed him one. "America-san your teeth are black.." Japan pointed out. America began to cough again but he got up and made his way to the bathroom. England went after him along with Canada. Everyone else just stared at the black stuff on the table.

"Is it just me or does that stuff look…" Spain began to say. "Like oil." Hong Kong stated. Everyone nodded and exchanged looks. "I remember once that America-san told me his saliva is his 'Gulf Coast' and the water around it…" Japan says this and everyone looks worried. England comes back tears on his face mumbling that its all his fault. Canada tries to calm him down saying it was BP's fault if the blame is to be given.

~July 26, 2010~

America coughs but it barely bothers him anymore. He's been coughing and spitting up black stuff for so long he barely notices. But suddenly his mouth begins to taste better. Mid-meeting he realizes his spit is barely black, "Yes!" he yells much to everyone's nerves. He begins to dance, "They stopped the leak, they stopped the leak!" he chants over and over. He runs up to Hungary kissing her. Then follows and kisses everyone out of sheer joy that his mouth wasn't nasty anymore.

England walked in late (he had been busy yelling at BP for the millionth time) only to be tackled by a happy American. But England didn't even have time to react before America had ran out the door. The countries gathered around the window watching as America randomly hugged and kissed random people. Japan just face-palmed because here they all were watching as America harassed his people….


	11. Hawaii

A/N: This one was written by my friend and edited by me instead of me writing it and her editing it. So thank her kindly with reviews and requests!

"America, your eyesight is getting worse. I need to find out what prescription to replace the current lenses in Texas with." Hungary said, a small smirk on her face.

"Great, I not only had to hear that from Obama, but now my eye doctor," America sighed.

"Hmm… He was right. I guess he caught on about how you have been squinting lately," Hungary seemed to be smiling about something America couldn't guess.

"I've been squinting? I guess Hawaii had another volcanic eruption," America said casually.

"Come right over here and I'll check your sight," the brunette said, gesturing to the chair next to her.

America sat down on the cushions with a sigh. He really hated getting his eyes checked. Every President made him, though. He did understand that it was to benefit his economy, but since years pass quickly for nations, it seemed too frequent for the blonde's liking. This year, his optometrist was Hungary. At least this year it wasn't Cuba. That was a really tense checkup…

"Alright. Can you read this?" Hungary said after setting up the lens set to test his left eye, since that was the problem eye at the moment. Hawaii, being volcanic, sometimes got blurry to the point that the left lens of Texas had to be replaced.

America looked through the binocular-like test. Though the words were blurry, he could see that it was a whole paragraph. "Do you always give your patients whole paragraphs to read as a test?" the blonde asked quizzically.

The green eyed woman shook her head slightly. "No, just the ones I know." She turned the knob on the binoculars to switch the magnification. "Is that better?"

America could now see the words clearly and began to answer, "Yes, I can see it no- You don't really expect me to read that, do you?" The blue eyed nation's face grew as red as his national flower.*

"Yes, unless you want my frying pan to fix your eyes," the Hungarian said, am very menacing aura emanating from her. It was so visible that the usually oblivious Spain, who just happened to be trimming the hedges outside of Hungary's office, could see it.

America, seeing the Spaniard, immediately called for help using some of the Spanish that Mexico had been teaching him over the years. "Ayuda! Esta chica esta loca tratando de hacerme leer algo pervertido!" (In English: "Help! This crazy chick is trying to make me say something perverted!")

"Lo siento, mi amigo. I cannot help you," the tanned man said, backing away, hands up in a gesture of apology.

Defeated, America turned back to the now grinning-like-mad Hungary. She looked like a kid in a candy store.

'This can't be good…' America thought.

"Well, then… When are you going to read it? I don't have all day," she said, an evil glint in her eyes.

America gulped. This could not end well.

~You can imagine this part for yourself~

By the end of America's oration, Hungary was nose bleeding and grinning like the Cheshire Cat.

~The next day, at Japan's house~

Japan heard the doorbell ring and hurried to greet his guest. "Konnichiwa, Hungary-san. To what honor do I owe this visit?" He greeted his friend formally.

"Please, we're friends. You can drop the formalities," Hungary stated, handing him an audio disc.

The otaku immediately smiled, ushering his friend in.

"I figured you would want some inspiration for some yaoi, so I took this audio during America's eye checkup yesterday. I was his optometrist this year. Hawaii was acting up again, so he had to get his prescription changed." She grinned madly at the last part.

"Ah. So that's how you managed to get him to say it…" Japan said, completely unsurprised.

*America's national flower is the rose


	12. Grand Canyon

A/N: Sorry it takes me so long to update. I just keep getting writers block halfway through this chapter. This chapter is a bit different but sometimes it's good to change things up a bit. Review and Request!

Hungary had a plan to help her dearest friend. Ukraine, Belarus and Hungary walked out of the hotel's locker room into the gym. Ukraine was blushing because she knew of Hungary's plan. Belarus was excited because she got to see her brother/future husband, Russia. Belarus could careless about her sister trying to hook up with Prussia.

Prussia also knew some of Hungary's plan and couldn't wait to show off for Ukraine. So he challenged America to a Battle of Awesomeness. Basically just another day at the gym for them accept they would be working out shirtless. Hungary had properly prepared by bringing a box of tissues for nosebleeds.

The trio of girls sat down on a bench and pretended to be lifting weights until the two guys came out.

Prussia had a nice build. But he didn't have America's advantage.

"OMG, look at America's body!" Ukraine exclaimed in total awe.

Hungary frowned, "It's only defined looking because of the Grand Canyon makes the lines on his abs look deeper! Look at Prussia he has a nice body too!"

Sadly, Ukraine was to busy flirting with America to notice poor Prussia. Hungary sighed and looked around for Belarus who was nowhere in sight. Then Russia walked in.

"Why are you flirting with my sister?" Russia asked bluntly. America suddenly wished he put on a shirt. Not because he was scared of Russia but because the large man always made a room drop in temperature.

That is why America ran away. Not because Russia had produced any sort of weapon or because he was scared for his life. America had totally ran away to get his body warmer.

At least that was what he was trying to convince himself of as he hid behind the reception counter. Unfortunately Russia had found him.

In between punches into Missouri (his stomach) Belarus found her big brother and had forced Russia to let go of America. Okay more like Russia saw Belarus and ran for it, but same thing.

America still owed the creepy nation even if she didn't get there fast enough. Then again, as the nurse ran her hand down the Grand Canyon, he decided maybe it was a good thing he got a huge bruise across his abs.


	13. Great Lakes

A/N: Reading the reviews makes me so happy! Thanks a million to you all! Please review and give me some requests!

"Canada! Oh, Mr. Canada!" America yelled throwing rocks at a certain northern nation's window. Canada looked at the clock, it was about 10 in the morning which meant he had planned on sleeping for at least two more hours. He rolled over and went to his window.

"What do you wan- OW!" Poor Canada yelled out as he got a rock to the face. To him it was almost as bad as the baseball he'd gotten to the face awhile back. America was in the house and at his side before he'd even managed to find a hockey stick.

"Why didn't you just walk through the door in the first place?" the non-morning person yelled at his dumb brother.

"I just didn't want to be near you when you woke up!" America (the dumb brother) countered. Canada gave America a glare then went to get ready for the rest of his sure to be horrible day.

~Hours Later~

"No," Canada simply stated. They were sitting in the dining room eating dinner. America had just asked him to do something crazy.

"Come on!" America pouted, "Are you telling me it doesn't bother you that we have a common landmark that goes unappreciated?" Canada sighed, he hadn't planned on giving in but his brother did have a point.

"Fine," the Canadian gave in a few minutes later. They were out the door in seconds.

~At a tattoo parlor~

"Hey! We want matching tattoos!" the over-excited American stated in an over-excited manner. Canada sighed somehow knowing he would be paying for it. The big tattooed and pierced man led them into a room. They decide, after much arguing, they would get the tattoos on their right hip. That way no one but the selected would see it. America pulled out the picture they would both be getting : A picture of the Great Lakes. Neither blonde would get Lake Michigan considering that it isn't on the border like the rest.

America barely showed a difference while he got his brotherly-secret inked on. Canada tried to be the same but he ended up letting out a few winces.

"Who do we show first?" America asked as they walked out. In unison they thought of the same person. England.

~At England's house~

"Ready?" Canada asked a little scared. Terrified America could only shake his head yes. They marched up and rang the doorbell. England answered and though he was confused let his ex-colonies inside his house.

"You wanted to show me something?" England inquired as they sat down for tea.

"Y-yes we did," Without further thought both boys stood up and showed the father-figure their tattoos. England's face went red. Then it went a little blue like he was holding his breath trying not to yell. The boys looked at each other. Then ran.

Once a safe distance away they burst into laughter. "That was great!" America cried out mid-laughter.

"Oh my! We must go to Papa France's next!" Canada exclaimed. So they did. They had no idea why it sounded like a good idea at the time.

~At France's house~

They had just showed France their tattoos and he just sat there. He didn't get angry or even blush. He just sat there drinking his tea. Finally he sat his tea down and said, "England has better tattoos then that…"

The shocked boys just stood there. Then England walked through the door.

"I wasn't mad you bloody fools I was trying to hold in my laughter at such a weak sign of rebellion," was all England said before America with Canada in tow stormed out yelling about showing the 'old people' a real sign of rebellion.


	14. Louisiana

A/N: Thanks so much for the reviews! They brighten my day so much! Please keep reviewing and requesting! Oh and Hetalia isn't mine!

"Hello, everyone and welcome to today's world conference…" Germany began his usual speech. The German was surprised he'd yet to be interrupted or insulted and he was almost done with his presentation. Then he realized that the nation on his right wasn't America. Germany was trying to figure out who this nation that looked so much like America was when the real American walked in.

"Sorry I'm late!" America announced to the room. He knew they all must've been so bored since they surely insisted on waiting on him. He noticed England was glaring at him and everyone was giving him weird looks. America looked down and realized he hadn't worn his dress-up clothes.

~Two Minutes Later~

"How dare you embarrass me like that!" England was shouting at poor America while France was holding the British man back.

"Now, now let us calm…" France tried to sooth the situation but had no such luck.

America didn't get why England had a stick up his 'bum'. After all, America almost always came in dressed inappropriately. He realized it must be his awesome new shoes. The shoes were skater style bright orange and neon green with some powder blue and black on them.

"France, you can let go of him," America smiled, "England if you were jealous of Louisiana's clothing you just had to tell me! We can go get you a pair of awesome shoes!"

With that America tried to drag England to the local Walmart to trick him into getting some cheap ugly shoes. He didn't want to be mean to England but there was no way America was letting him have the same shoes for his feet as America had for Louisiana. Meanwhile, England was holding in his laughter at the American. Walmart was such an U.S. thing, with the get everything you could possibly need in one store, and they definitely wouldn't have a Walmart Superstore in Norway were they were currently located. England just smiled knowing this was going to be a long trip.

A/N: I'm not sure if they have Walmart's anywhere but in the U.S. if I'm wrong please let me know.


	15. Oklahoma and Wisconsin

A/N: I'm so happy when I see all the reviews I get so keep reviewing and requesting! I like this chapter but also I don't… Just the first idea that came to my mind.. Enjoy! Also Fight Club isn't mine but it is an awesome movie! You don't have to watch it to understand this chapter though.

"That was an awesome movie!" America shouted holding up his fists playfully hitting Japan.

"Yes it was," Japan said politely as they walked out of the movie theater. They had just watched the movie Fight Club. Japan actually thought it had been silly but he didn't want to disappoint his friend.

When they got back to America's house, Japan immediately started setting up the newest video game system. America went to go grab sodas for them. He walked in looking thoughtful. Japan was scared of that face more then anything else. Mostly because it usually ended up with them getting shot at, yelled at, or imprisoned.

"Japan, I just had an awesome idea!" America shouted randomly a few minutes later, "What if we made our own Fight Club?"

Japan wanted to laugh and say it was crazy but there was no stopping America when he had that look on his face.

~One Crazy Week Later~

"Okay everyone, the first rule of Fight Club is: You don't talk about Fight Club" America announced to the room of nations. He had been surprised so many had showed up. He was scared when he first saw Switzerland because he probably brought at least one gun with him. But after a through search he realized no one was trying to cheat they all just wanted to beat each other up. Little did they all know that Oklahoma and Wisconsin had been trained well. America looked down at his hands letting Japan finish up telling the rules. His left hand, Oklahoma was actually his writing hand but Wisconsin, his right hand, had a way harder punch. America of course had a lot of strength in both hands but he'd have to make sure not to hit to hard and break either. That could cause a few 'natural disasters' in both.

America's first fight was up against Latvia. America just couldn't hit the little guy. That is until Latvia hit him square in Arkansas. Then Latvia sucker punched him in Missouri. America couldn't believe the punch the timid nation had! America held up fists and blocked. Then America swung out Wisconsin and knocked out Latvia in one punch.

~Six Months Later~

America was in the hospital, again. Sure enough he had broken both hands. Germany was in the next bed over. He had three broken ribs. America looked at his gauzed body and laughed thinking about all the natural disasters that were happening right now because of his not-as-awesome-as-he-thought idea.

A/N: No countries where hurt in the making of this fic. (Much…)


	16. New York City

A/N: So thanks again for all the reviews they mean a million! So keep reviewing and keep on with the requests!

America has girlfriend. A pretty redhead normal human girl. This week they are in his heart aka New York City. The only problem is that its his turn to host the World Conference Meeting. So he has to hide her while still showing her a good time.

~At Central Park~

They were getting hot dogs. America was so nervous he could only eat one, which was probably a good thing. They were holding hands admiring some pretty tulips when America spotted Egypt and Turkey walking together. He couldn't tell if they were fighting or being friendly but he decided to not wait around and find out. His heart skipped a beat as he lied to this girl saying he had forgotten his allergy pill. He hated lying but he didn't want to lose her. America realized he was falling in love. This was bad because France can sense that from a kilometer away.

~At the Statue of Liberty aka his aorta~

America was taking pictures of his red head beauty at the base of his aorta when in the distance he saw Japan, China, Taiwan and all the other Asian countries. He figured they must be on a 'family' trip. So in order to get away he declared a race to the top of the Statue of Liberty. He knew both Japan and Korea are deathly scared of heights. So he figured none of the nations would be up there. He could tell the girl was confused yet she still followed him. She didn't ask and she didn't yell at him like most other girls would. Which meant she must trust him. When they finally stopped she kissed him. This touched his heart again he wanted to tell her his feelings.

~A few close calls later….~

They ended up in his hotel room. Where they got to know each other better minus the talking.

~Outside the Empire State Building~

After taking more pictures they began to make out. They had broken the kiss for air when America realized he had been spotted. France, Spain and Prussia were walking his way with huge smiles. America quickly manage to get her to go and buy them drinks. She ran across the street just in time.

"Hey guys what's up?" America asked trying to be nonchalant. France smiled and answered him in Latin. America's Latin sucked he knew a total of 1 sentence which was 'I don't speak Latin'. He said that phase now.

"He said what a pretty girl that was," Spain told America chuckling, "He also asked if she was your 'girlfriend'?"

America shot the Trio a glare before quickly running away. He'd be damned to hell before losing the girl he loved to one of those nations. Unfortunately America wasn't the most lucky.

~A few hours later~

"Ve, America it's a surprise to see you here! Who is this lovely creature?" Italy half-yelled in the club. America sighed he should have known better then to go to an awesome club with her. He had to find an escape route quickly before Germany showed up. Or worse S. Italy or Spain or Prussia. His head was spinning as he realized any nation could be here with Italy. He was friends with everyone!

The next thing America knew he was in a hospital bed.

~In the Hospital~

As it was America had fainted do to an anxiety attack. Every nation close to him and the love of his life was in his room. He had failed. She would surely break up with him after being hit on by so many nations. He wondered which she would chose over him. This would mean New York City would be rainy for weeks. It would break his heart but he would understand. America sat up ready to embrace the sadness sure to come.

Instead he got a kiss and a hug. She asked why had he hidden the fact that he was supposed to be with his family. Then it hit America that of course the other nations couldn't steal her. After all he was the hottest on in his whole family. He began to laugh and pulled his fire-haired goddess into a tight hug. Little did he know that his family had been the ones to talk her out of leaving him.

~3 weeks later~

She broke up with him for eating all the food in her house. America realized she was a huge bitch. It still rained for about a week in New York City. No one bothered to say 'I told you so'.

A/N: It was requested that I cover 9/11 but I chose against that due to the fact that I was pretty young when it happened and I honestly don't feel it would be right for me to talk about something that serious without understanding it more fully. Also even though some chapters of this are sort of serious all in all its meant to be more humorous then anything else.


	17. Tennessee and Kentucky

A/N: So I don't know how long its been but I hope not too long. The program I type on is being really weird so sorry if this is spaced all weird. So read and review because it makes you more awesome than Prussia!

"Ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch," America panted making his way to China's door. To no ones but his own surprise as soon as he had step foot into the hotel in China, Cuba had taken a crowbar to him. Sadly, everyone he'd asked refused to treat him saying that he deserved it. All because at the last meeting he'd said some not cool things behind Cuba's back and Cuba had heard him. Other countries did that to each other all the time!

America finally made it to China's door, and since it hurt to bad to move his arms, he knocked with his head. Probably making for another concussion.

"Coming aru!" The petite man cried out coming to the door a few short seconds later.

"Hey China what's up?" America said as the Chinese man looked over the half dead looking man in front of him.

"Aru…." China sighed, he let the blonde nation in without a single question. He then went to get his medical supplies.

~A few minutes later~

"So where does it hurt aru?" China asked and half-sighed.

"In Tennessee and Kentucky.." America blankly stated looking like he was trying to act tough. China looked confused so America explained further, "My collarbones.."

With that China went to work repairing the nation. China didn't really want to help him but he couldn't really send him to a hospital. This nation and all other ones healed extremely fast. So something like shattered collarbones become just a fracture in a week or two depending on the amount of damage else where.

China had realized that America's right collarbone, Tennessee, had set wrong and that he'd have to re-break it.

China tried really hard not to laugh because that would be rude. But with the look on America's face when the Chinese man informed him that Russia would be the one to re-break Tennessee for him was priceless.

~After America tried to escape~

Russia just gave him one quick hit to the collarbone but still America passed out. China was able to fix him up no problem after that. Russia called England to come pick up America when China was done fixing him.


	18. Chapter 18

A/N: This is a recap chapter. So no one gets confused or anything about what is where. It was supposed to be Chapter 20 but I already had it written so I decided to post it. Read (if you want) and Review (this should be required)!

"America we can't switch places!" Canada shouted at his almost twin.

"Sure we can all we need is contacts and you a haircut!" America shouted back he really wanted to see what it was like not to be himself for a day.

"But your constantly referring to your body parts as states and I don't know all of that!" Canada countered mostly not wanting to ruin every peace treaty he'd made in a century in one day.

"I'll give you a list, here write this down!" America yelled thrusting a pen and paper at his brother.

"Okay first you have Texas," gestures to his glasses, "my eyes are Hawaii but my glasses are Texas so be sure to keep those straight."

America shivered remembering his last eye exam.

"Next you have Oklahoma and Wisconsin," America holds up his hands happy his make-shift Fight Club hadn't scared them up.

"My nails as you probably remember are green because of the marshes and swamp lands of the south," America continued trying to hurry.

"My abs are the Grand Canyon, oh yea remind me to call Ukraine, my stomach is Missouri and my bellybutton piercing is the St. Louis Arch." America laughed remembering when he had pulled England pants down at that one party. Canada quickly wrote it down.

"Disney land and Universal Studios/Disney World are my nipples and you umm.. should know what my umm… yea.. is…" America blushed at the memory of France pulling down America's pants in front of his family.

"So back to the matter at hand.." Canada said in his quieter then usual voice. America went on to tell him that his leg and arm hair is the Redwood National Park and that the constant pimple on his back was Old Faithful. America figured that Canada would remember that the Gulf Coast is his salvia and that Death Valley was the reason his skin got dry.

"Don't forget about Arkansas! I remember that its your nose because the time it turned white!" Canada whisper shouted proud that he knew at least one.

"New Jersey is my ear," America reminded himself to not bet on the St. Louis Cardinals this upcoming season, "And you can't forget our matching tattoos of the Great Lakes!"

"New York is my heart," America thought of his lovely red-headed ex-girlfriend.

"Tennessee and Kentucky, which I need to beat up Cuba, are my collarbones," The loud blonde continued ignoring his brother's confused look.

"Oh, and my feet are Louisiana, which reminds me…" With that America fled out of the room remembering that his new shoes had just came in.

A/N: This is just a catch up chapter for anyone who was confused on what was where .I hope you enjoy!


	19. California

A/N: Read and Review! Thanks to all of you who read this!

"So Mr. Jones what seems to be the problem?" The chiropractor asked America who was currently sitting in his office.

"It's California.. umm I meant, my spine.. it seems to have a curve to it," America sighed hating having to go to a mortal doctor. Unfortunately none of the countries were chiropractors.

"How long ago did you notice this?" The darker haired man asked in a serious voice. America thought about this realizing he noticed it back when he was a colony. He couldn't very well say that though.

"Umm.. every since I was really little.." America was a bit proud that he had proved England wrong. England and Canada had a bet going on how long it would be before America would slip up and start talking about other countries and all that stuff making him sound crazy.

"You might have scoliosis," The chiropractor continued rambling on about medical stuff. America got bored and just asked to doctor to get to the point. One solution was surgery. America freaked out.

"I can't have you open me up and fix California! I mean it hurts and all but that could kill the population or change the way the whole way I'm shaped! What if California became an island!" America shouted.

"Sir, I think you should leave before I call security," The chiropractor said in a calm yet stern voice. America left but then he realized that though he'd proved England wrong by lasting 5 minutes. He had lasted just past 30 minutes and Canada had bet he'd freak between 30 minutes to an hour.

"Damn Canadians…" America whispered to himself getting into his car.


	20. Colorado

A/N: Please Review! I've been getting less reviews which makes it harder to write…. Also check out my new story Discovering Happiness (be warned it's a serious fic)

America took a deep breath in getting ready to run. It was the 22nd Annual Nations' Olympics sponsored by Egypt (not that he knew that yet…). It was every country for himself and for team sports they went by continent and ties to each other. Naturally that meant England had to have France on his team. America wanted to laugh thinking about how England's face had gone every color of the rainbow when he heard that.

Someone (Switzerland) shot a 'fake' bullet into the air. America was pretty sure he heard someone cursing and someone cry out in pain. But he didn't care that Switzerland was a cheater because he began to run taking deep breaths into Colorado. He tried to not to slow down until he reached the finish line. His lungs, Colorado, had to work hard.

America had thought Colorado was a healthy enough state that he wouldn't need his inhaler anymore. Sadly, he did need it. So when the picture of America crossing the finish line was taken it was with an inhaler in his mouth. He knew that picture would haunt him for a very, very long time.


	21. Washington DC and Rocky Mtns

A/N: I'm sorry this took so long and that this chapter isn't that great. I've kind of lost my interest in this story. So this'll be the final chapter . Read and Review!

America walked up to Seychelles's door nervous. He had been invited to a Yaoi Fan Club meeting. It just so happened that he was the honorary focus of today's meeting. (Which meant if he didn't go Hungary would hit Florida and the surrounding regions with a frying pan). Needless to say he'd chosen to just go and get it over with.

"Welcome America!" Seychelles said with a smile. She ushered him into the meeting room. America was shocked to see the outcome. Not only were there almost every female nation but quite a few males also. Japan was no surprise but Egypt? America sat in his place and ate an offered cookie.

"So I think we should start off with picture sharing!" Hungary announced to the group. America turned a brighter shade then Romano as picture after picture was shown of him. Some half-naked, some with pairings, and the worse was Belarus' pictures of him in the shower.

"Next we have question and answer!" Hungary announced flipping the light on so America could see her holding her frying pan up. Hungary mouthed 'answer or I'll…' and did a frightening gesture. America wasn't scared of a girl… then again Hungary wasn't quite a 'girl'. She was a bit more like a _seme_ who happened to have female parts. So the question answer session began.

"Where is the Rocky Mountains on your body?" an abnormally loud Ukraine asked with a smirk. America realized that he was the only one completely sober. Taking this as a good sign he decided to answer. No, it was not because Hungary had began to polish her already shiny frying pan.. of course not.

"The Rocky Mountains…," America blushed, "is my happy trail…" realizing he sounded like a complete uke he added in a, "Next question for the super manly hero?" America tried to ignore the fact that not only had Prussia slipped in the room but France and Spain as well.

"How do you stay so thin? Do you do a lot of 'exercise'?" France asked out loud staying completely serious like the true professional he is. Prussia added in a snicker as Spain looked like he was trying not to burst into laughter. Again America, fighting down a blush, answered honestly.

"Well since Washington D.C. is my metabolism it's not as easy as you'd think. Whenever everyone like the Republicans and Democrats are fighting my metabolism is slow so I have to do vigorous exercise of _all _types…" America added in the emphasis to make sure he didn't sound to uke again. America also used big words so that he seemed serious and professional instead of nervous and embarrassed. Luckily for him, right then Hungary got an urgent text from Germany about Italy going missing. So the meeting broke up. America managed to escape before any new plans could be made for the re-do meeting. He also remembered to start showering with clothes on.

A/N: Sorry the last chapter couldn't be better! Well check out my other stories I promise they're just as awesome!


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